Gym Thoughts


I can do this. I can totally do this.

Did I eat breakfast today? I did. No. I didn’t. Yes…. I did. 307 calorie thing.

Ok  weights….ewwwww  that machine is so sweaty…gross.

150 lbs…I can do this  ok  120…..110.

ok, so like 50?  Twenty reps?  Ten reps, ten.

That girl is naked.  My underwear is bigger than her clothing. I can see all the things.

eight reps…eight is good…

I’m going to run now…..

No more running.

How many calories did I burn?  WHAT?  That’s wrong  that tracker is wrong.

So sweaty.

That guy is making noises that scare me. Sounds like a tortured animal…or he’s constipated…..I’m gonna avoid that whole section of the gym, just in case.

Weights….yeah, I got this. See that next guy?  I did 120 lbs…you don’t know how many reps I did  I could’ve done 50 for all you know.

3. I did three.

I mean, I can see all of her parts. Are those even real?  No, not real.

She is so tan, like cocoa, like a butted biscuit, like chewed up leather.

And I’m so pale, like cottage cheese…..

When did I shave?  How long has it been?  YIKES, just don’t look down.

Thats it, I’m out.


I’m hungry.






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